Kennyisms

10/30/13- Kenny was going to give a presentation on Eisenhower and said that he helped create NASA. He said this led to us landing on the moon. 

Jen - who was it that landed on the moon?

Kenny- Lance Armstrong. 

Jen - no

Kenny - oh come on, either Lance Armstrong or Buzz Aldin. 

While visiting family at Christmas Kenneth taught Kenny how to play poker. He started by showing him which hands were best from high card to royal flush. The next day they were playing and I overheard this conversation:
Kenneth: I bet $1
Kenny: I raise you.
Kenneth: are you sure?
Kenny: yes, I'm sure
Kenneth: ok, I have a pair of 8's. What do you have?
Kenny: I have a pair of 10's.
Kenneth: wow, I guess you knew what you were doing
Kenny: yep, and dad, I just want you to know when to hold em and when to fold em.

Jen and Kenneth talking about Chicago
Jen: chi town
Kenneth: Windy City
Jen: home of Oprah and Michael Jordan
Kenny: Michael Gordon?
Jen: yes, Michael Gordon, the famous bocce ball player. Geez.

Kenny just improved on an Aerosmith song... "You look like a lady"

7/25/21 Kenny trying to use the "half your age plus 7" rule for dating... Kenny: Half of 17 is...14, no, 13.5 1/29/22 Kenny: what's the phrase for sex? bumping socks? Oh yeah - knocking boots! 1/30/22 Kenny reading this blog - oh Jen, if you would have made me that butterscotch pie you would have had 100 and not 99. Jen- buttermilk pie? Kenny - ahhhh LOL 12/11/22 Kenny talking about his upcoming birthday, he didn't want us taking him to a place that sang. We said we would find a place that put a sombrero on him and sang. Kenny starts singing "Feliz Cumpleaños, feliz Cumpleaños, Te deseamos a ti, ..." Then he thought about the next line and sang "I don't know the word for birthday, ... wait". He laughed really hard at himself. 2015- Kenny sitting in front of us on a plane, talking to the random lady sitting next to him: Welcome to Canada Airlines, here’s your tea You come to America, and your get a fire arm and student loan debt Sure, I’ve dealt with wolf spiders, but I don’t want them to sting me. Anything with more legs than me, just nah. Except dogs and cats. One thing that makes me nervous about traveling to Japan, is that I heard they have giant hornets. In Canada, they have poutine, and what can I say I like being fat. I’m a huge history buff, and I like to add what countries history I like. Mexico, their history is pretty shotty... a few history facts then Revolt revolt revolt. I could probably teach history to a bunch of adults and they would hear things they’ve never heard. For sand colors we have pristine white and eggshell white. I wonder if there are weird laws in Montana Space is scary. There’s things floating around up there that can kill you. And do you know how hot it can get? Like 3000 degrees. The only thing hotter is the metal part of the seat belt on a hot summer day. Uranus - I think it’s a gas giant. Why can’t they have a teddy bear fish or make up fish or a fish that doesn’t look like it came from a back alley. July 2019: Jen, the next time you’re at the store can you get more of that hair wash? Lunch w Grandma - 8/8/21 Grandma gets in truck- to Jen: what happened to your hair?!?! No, I like it. It looks like a wig. At lunch: grandma to waitress (looking at Kenny) “how do you like his hair? He’s single. He’s going to be a senior at Bixby”. Waitress: I have a boyfriend Grandma: oh, ok. He works at Quiktrip Grandma: Kenny (Kenneth) turn around and look at that guy, he looks like Robin. (Kenny looks) Grandma: Don’t look when he’s looking! Kenny: Robin has less hair. Grandma: holding up a small asparagus, I wouldn’t serve this…. But I’ll eat it Talking about birthdays… Kenny: (about Duncan grandma) she was born in 1953? Grandma: (looks at Jen) you were born WHEN? Waking Kenny up - Jen: Do you know what time it is? Kenny: (still sleepy) yeah, it’s 7 after 8:45